Day 264
I forgot how much it hurts to care about someone. I forgot that sometimes this means you have to say goodbye to them on a street corner, pretending you aren't crying when clearly you are, and you don't want to look back, but you do, and you wave until the van pulls out of sight, and then you go inside and cry with your forehead against the wall. Then you'll think, gee that was the last time that person will throw rocks at my window and I didn't have anything else to say but, "Theo from The Cosby Show was the hottest ever when he got cornrows." Just in: Despite me trying not to be I am a human being--well, at least until the superhero unitard I ordered on Ebay gets shipped.
If that morning wasn't enough I had to go to work at The Post Office today. While the line kept growing and I kept getting told, "The last time I was here it was only 6 dollars to send a giant box to Hong Kong" I looked over at my friend who was just as busy and he said, "I have become a robot." It was then that I realized that this was the key to Postal Success: become a robot. This was exciting news, who doesn't like robots?! The only problem is that robots don't really want to take the 22 dollar package to Hong Kong and smash it on the floor, and I kinda like wanting to smash things. I guess I am more Hulk than Robot.
I went to my third official job interview today. This time it was for a neighborhood pub. My first official I-have-a-work-permit-to-work-legally-in-this-country-bitches interview. Since it was directly after I got off from what my mother calls, "postmistressing" duty I had to change, apply makeup, and catch a bus in an hour. When I arrived I was a tad nervous, the woman who was set to interview me waltzed up to me and asked, "What you doing for work?" I have never gone to a job interview where I was asked what I was doing for work. The rest of the interview was her asking me about school and how Canada differs from the States. After I was guided by a customer to the only door that actually opens to the outside world I stumbled to the bus stop thinking, "Did I just get that job? I have no idea."
On the way to supper I went into the foyer of the dining hall building where some girl pointed to a bush just outside and declared, "You just walked by a skunk! There is one in that bush!" After supper I was speaking to my mother on my cellphone outside and related the story. Her reaction to the skunk visitor, "Get your ass inside! It'll bite you!" My reaction to her reaction: go skunk hunting. I kept her on the line just to prove that I still do the opposite of everything she tells me to do. I snuck around in the middle of the yard, far from the bushes that the skunks are building a condo in. I didn't see any skunks at all. I detailed it to my mother over the phone with her yelping on the other end, scared. I crossed over to cut through the hedges and as I did, I heard a noise in the bushes. All of my bravery drained away and I ran screaming inside. Mom: 2,987 Me: 0.
So, instead of reading the short stories I am supposed to read for the magazine at school I have decided to watch TV. Here are a few things that I have noticed about TV today:
Somehow watching Intervention and drinking cheap wine seem to go together. This is obvious, but I did some research, when you ask everyone you know if they drink and watch Intervention they will tell you they do.
If you have cable TV you can always find Cheers and/or The Cosby Show on air at any time of day. All I have to say about that: Thank, God.
For the first time ever I watched a TV show with my friend, who was on Skype watching the same show at the same time in a different city. The echo was kind of annoying, but having someone to ask, "Am I a Hoarder?" to every two minutes was kind of nice.
Commercials have not gotten any better. I don't really know what I was expecting. I guess that they don't have the threat of cancellation, so maybe the evolution of them is at a slower rate. But seriously, if you made a laundry detergent commercial hilarious or so artistic that it is hilarious I may be more willing to spend 7 bucks more per bottle than the cheap brand.
Shows about how Raisinets and other movie theatre candies are made are actually just like watching Mister Roger's Neighborhood, without ever going to The Land of Make-Believe and there are waaaay more fat people.
Tip of the Day: There are never never-ending refills at home, and that ain't no double negative.
-Canadian Castaway
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