Day 194
I need to get a more exciting life. Not only for the sake of the blog, but because the how to write TV book told me to. In the book it says that a good way to get inspired for storylines is to turn off your TV and go out and get yourself a life. This was devastating news. Without TV watching my life resembles the lonely lady who sent my mom a Christmas card that said she did 2 fun things over the past year and one of them was having a friend over for coffee, except my list would be worse. For example today's list would include:
1. I did laundry. The lint traps are always full. I pull them out to see if there are bugs in them.
2. I changed my bathroom light bulbs. They are tricky looking florescent numbers. I had to crawl up on the sink and almost fell off when my head hit the ceiling, but I didn't fall off.
3. I washed dishes. The tupperware containers smelled like the food that was previously occupying them. I thought about throwing them away, but didn't.
And finally, the most exciting part of my day:
4. The plate that I leaned against the smelly containers looked like it would fall off and break. It did.
Ha! Take that Christmas card lady, I have 4 fun things on my list just today! Maybe I oughta send out a letter.
As with every Monday there were tater tots and then classes. The tater tots were plentiful and just cold enough so that you could pound them down, but not too cold so as to feel like tater tot-sicles. The classes didn't suck as much as usual. I actually learned something very important: I don't need to go to Fiction class anymore. That's right, I finally figured that shit out. This is a workshop class, which means people bring in their work, everyone reads it, and then we all discuss it. The valuable part of going to class is to learn to articulate what is mostly not working in each story. But today I realized that every time we discuss a story the same three issues are brought up as the main weaknesses. 1. Why are we hearing this story now in the timeline of the characters? 2. Go deeper, take it to the next level. and 3. Be more clear. I was so excited when I figured this out. I had thought, this is wonderful I no longer have to go to class. This translates to more time devoted to TV watching. But, now I have to turn off the TV and get a life, so all the learning I did today was for nothing other than the pursuit of knowledge. Damn.
Even though or maybe because I am not supposed to be watching TV, I watched TV tonight. I watched Taking the Stage. The first season of this reality show about teenagers in a performance school had me in passionate, caring tears. The second (current) season is absolutely terrible. The kids are all too pretty and rich. The returning cast member is good, but not so heartfelt as last year and the one girl (who just so happens to be one of 2 Emily's on the show) says "like" like all the fucking time.
And yet, I keep watching. It's like every week I am waiting for it to be good, to be once again full of genuine passion. Or, I am tuning in just to hate on it. Tuning in just to be sure that I still hate it. Either way it shouldn't take a full episode to decide, but no matter, I watch them anyway. Hopefully, the damn thing will be cancelled so I know there aren't unwatched episodes that I must attend to. It won't and I'll have to choke it down until it's through just like pills that make you sick while allegedly making you better. Usually, the sickness from them definitely outweighs the benefits. Not this time. I am not even getting mildly high, just a little more hateful.
The best TV I saw today was Degrassi Talks. Apparently, this was something that the kids from Degrassi did many years later and discussed certain topics. The one I just watched talked about sexuality. They went out and interviewed people on the street and complied opinions about how people hate gay people and how some kid with a mullet thinks masturbation will probably hurt your chances of being able to have a kid. But, the best interview had a guy who said that he didn't like zits when he hit puberty but pubic hair was pretty great because, "you can play with it." When asked where he got erections he said, "Don't read anything into this, but I get them in church." I am not going to lie, I wondered if I could stalk him online.
In other disjointed news: The Valentine's Day date from hell guy and I aren't really talking, pretty sure a V-day diss is grounds to ruin a friendship. I realized I damn near always start chat conversations with my bodyguard, but this doesn't make me want to stop harassing him. I have a crush on a guy at my work (again) and he looks like Snake from Degrassi except he doesn't have red hair. But, this means he looks nothing like him. All of the people in my program (myself included) are in some sort of Spring I-want-to-fuck-things heat, but no one is getting laid. And, I agreed to co-write a TV series this fall. As long as my writing partner provided me with an endless supply of Tang.
Tip of the Day: If you like changing your gmail chat phrase every two minutes although no one notices, keep doing it.
-Canadian Castaway
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