Day 171
So, my punishment was lifted today long enough for me to go to a party. The time is now: 3:33 am so I will make this brief.
Before the party I was all whiny about the rainy shit weather we have been having so I pouted for about 6 hours before I just crawled back into bed. When I emerged 45 minutes later all was cured. As it turns out I am a baby. Seriously, when I get fussy just put me to bed. Just think, if this were true for everyone on earth (and who knows it may be). Bam! There goes anti-depressants.
While I was getting ready for the party I google video chatted with my niece and her mother. Here is a snippet of what was actually said:
Niece's mother about niece: Yeah, this one here always comes over and pretends to give me a hug just so she can fart on me.
Me to Child: You don't do that do you?
Child: YES! HAHAHAHA!
I love that kid. I may employ her strategy on people I don't really like or just find a five year old to do it for me.
Tonight's party was a fiasco of drinking, eating, singing and playing games. If it weren't for the drinking one would've thought they were at a child's party--a poor child's party as there were no party favors, pin the tail on the donkey contests, hats, or pinatas. Had these items been there I would never have wanted it to end. Here is what we did instead:
-Leg wrestling. Which was scary and sad. Scary when the big guy kicked the little guy and you could hear it and sad because one girl's crotch was wet and everyone saw it. But, it all turned out okay, she was completely oblivious to it, but she did lose her match. The best part though was that nobody could agree on the rules so we actually wikipedia-ed it.
-Back rub chains. Seriously, I don't know how these things start but they always end up with all the men rubbing each other. So, not all bad. I will note that my playing farm on people's backs was not as popular as expected.
-Two-handed slap and thumb wars. Canadians do some sort of "Kiss, kiss..." line when they play thumb wars and some of them are awfully scary about two-handed slap.
-Stella Ella Ola. This is some sort of Canadian version of the game where you go around the circle chanting, slapping hands in a relay and counting to ten. This is something that is played in the States there it's called something like: Oboe Shin Atin Tot In."
-Arm wrestling. This I mostly watched and made bets on. When it came my turn I took on the strongest female in the bunch and we held each other even left-handed until I gave up, out of boredom.
-Singing. We sang Hallelujah, Oh Canada, and some Neutral Milk Hotel. But, when they started up with the Mamas and the Papas I will admit I got a little creeped out. There is nothing so horrifying as a group of drunk Canadians singing, California Dreamin'.
Tip of the Day: Don't stay out until 3 am, it's usually not worth it. Go home at 2:30.
-Canadian Castaway
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