Day 20
There is nothing more horrifying than a fake nerd. I don't mean poser nerds like myself but people who are relied upon to be nerds like anybody who is entrusted by society to solve medical dilemmas. I know there is a fancified version of medical researchers and professionals glorified by American television, but, when it really comes down to it would you rather have a pretty boy Noah Wyle-type ripping apart and reconstructing your innards or a super geek? While it's nice to have the eye candy it isn't gonna mean shit if you're dead, right?
This was my mentality today when a harmless breakfast conversation went astray. We were all speaking about Halloween when one of us turned to the other (a medical professional wannabe) and said, "You should be Gandalf." His reaction was, "Who's Gandalf? Was he like the wizard on Harry Potter?" I feel sorry for the sucker who is going to pay mega bucks to have him save their life one day. Maybe sending in college transcripts shouldn't be enough to guarantee admittance to medical school, maybe their should be a nerd aptitude test.
Anyway, today I went to three bookstores. The first stop was a comic book shop. I love walking into comic book shops. It is so fun to be the only female. It almost makes me want to be anorexic for 6 months to drop 40 pounds and be able to actually keep the attention of the super geeks. It is one thing to make them turn their heads but quite another to make them drool onto a Vintage Superman. Hell, if I lost 40 pounds I would hit on "more attractive guys" and wish later that they had the hearts and minds that the men clinging to 1st edition Spidermans have.
The second bookshop was a used store that didn't have the book I was looking for. But, it did contain many of my favorite books and a wiry, white-haired man with six earrings in one ear, a lisp, and a hatred for Hemingway. In other words, I found paradise. I listened as he patiently put in an order for a book that was recently made into a movie and watched as he pulled out a book for an old woman who had seen the cover in the window. I watched like he were a master magician capable of great magic, even though he couldn't produce the book on my list.
The third bookshop was the University bookstore. I dread going to this behemoth of over-priced headphones, boring textbooks, and expensive marketing tools, but I promised a friend a red and a green pen. I found what I was looking for and joined a serpentine line filled with co-ed undergrads the young couple behind me actually had this conversation:
"I like, can't believe they are charging me $150 for this book."
"Yeah, it's like ridiculous. I bet all of the people who write textbooks are millionaires."
"Totally. What I want to know is how they can charge so much."
"Yeah, you should like vandalize the book before we get to the cash register and tell them it was like that and they might give you a discount."
"I should, that's a good idea I'd be all like, 'It was like this I swear.' And, like the cover would be ripped off." pause "I still can't believe they want $150 dollars for it."
"Maybe one of your friends took the class before and you could borrow their book."
"Yeah, I don't know."
"Or, you could like check it out online."
"Yeah, but--"
"Who's paying for it."
"My parents."
"Oh, nevermind. Do you want some chocolate?"
"Yeah, I want this huge box, it's thirty bucks do you think I should get it?"
After my bookshopping excursions and an afternoon nap I had to go to a meet and greet party at my department. My department is housed in a building that is filled with asbestos, rats, broken glass, defective smoke detectors and lead paint. But, they know how to throw a shindig. We may not be able to have the broken windows repaired or the toxic wall stuffing removed but, we were able to afford a long table filled with fancy cheeses. An impressive feat considering that cheese in this country is so expensive that the spread they had going was valued at enough money to buy a decent used car. Throw in the cost of the special tiny grapes and we could've purchased a brand new Prius who needs a new window or clean air?
In conclusion, nerds are not always nerds, comic book geeks and people who work in bookstores are alright but not too attractive, undergrads suck, and the arts maybe aren't that underfunded, just careless with their money.
-Canadian Castaway
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